Have you ever answered the call of God to step out in faith, and then felt like the ground crumbled beneath you? This happened to me last week, and I discovered I hadn’t been trusting in God as much as I should have been.

First a little catch-up, in case you’re new to my blog. I’m a single mom of three boys, and I’ve been writing on the side while operating a daycare for the past 4 1/2 years.

Over the past year, I felt God leading me to sell my daycare and expand my writing ministry. After months of prayer and seeking counsel from some wonderful, godly people in my life, I finally took the leap and put up the “For Sale” sign.

The state licensing authority informed me that daycares are nearly impossible to sell in our part of the state, but God had other plans. From the day I hung the sign, to the day I signed papers with the new owner was six weeks!

I was willing to go out and get a part-time job after the sale, but I felt God leading me to focus my efforts on finishing a devotional book I’d started and making it available to the readers of my blog.

Last week (with great excitement!) I made the announcement that my book is nearly ready to launch out into the world.

And here comes the ground crumbling part:

(This “incident” is mostly due to the fact I’m technologically-challenged. Which is a nice way of saying I’m kinda hopeless when it comes to computer-techy stuff.)

Not knowing any better, I set up my email list in a way which allowed nasty little bots to sign up to my blog. Lots and lots of nasty little bots. They didn’t do anything bad, like spread viruses. But they did make it appear like my list was bigger than it was. As it turns out, much bigger.

So here I am, going along my merry way, thinking I’m spreading hope and good cheer to many, many people via my email list.

Thinking these same people may like to order a book one day.

I have to pause the story for a minute, and tell you about my Bible study on the morning of my war with the bots. I’m studying the life of Gideon, and that morning’s lesson was about God thinning the army of Gideon before they fought the Midianites.

The Midianite army was 135,000 men strong. (Judges 8:10) When Gideon started out, he had 32,000 ragtag soldiers. Then God said to send home anyone who was afraid, and 22,000 of his men up and left. (Judges 7:3)

(At this point, I’m sure Gideon was getting nervous. I mean, he barely had an army to begin with. But God wasn’t done.)

God told Gideon he still had too many soldiers! Gideon sent his thirsty soldiers down to get a drink, and while they were drinking, God singled out 300 men for the battle.


Against 135,000.

Yeah, that’s going to work.

But it did. (If you’ve never read the story, it’s in Judges 7-8. It’s better than a Marvel movie, I’m telling you!) God took those 300 soldiers and brought a great victory to Israel.

Back to my bot war….

I sat down at my laptop, determined to rid my list of robot subscribers. I knew there were lots of them, but I wrongly believed I still had a good-sized list of real, living and breathing people.

Deleting robots is tedious, time-consuming work. I deleted. And deleted. And deleted some more.

I started to worry.

Lord, I stepped out in faith to write this book. And now it appears I may not even be able to cover the cost of launching it. Help!!!!

I deleted well over a thousand fake subscribers from my list. I ended up with an “army” a little smaller than Gideon’s.

Needless to say, I was discouraged. And maybe slightly panicky.

But it was no accident I had bought a Bible study book a few weeks back—a book on Gideon. And it was no accident the very day I found out my “army” was much smaller than I figured, I studied how God took away all Gideon had been depending upon.

God forced Gideon to depend on Him alone, and He was doing the same to me.

Here’s a small excerpt from what I read that morning:

“You may not be particularly happy with the 300 you’ve been left with…But according to II Corinthians 12:9, ‘Power is perfected in weakness.’ The 300 is our secret weapon. It’s a showground for God’s strength. It’s not ‘more,’ but it is better because it’s what God will use to bring victory into our lives.” (Priscila Shirer, Gideon)

God reassured me that everything was going to be okay. He’s always provided for me and protected me—even to the point of orchestrating miraculous circumstances.

I don’t know the future. I don’t know if I will sell one book or one hundred or one thousand.

But it doesn’t matter. God told me to write, and I will write. God told me to spread the joy of Jesus, and I will. God told me to tell my redemption story to as many as will listen, and I will continue to do so.

How about you, my friend? Is there an area of your life where you feel like God has stripped away your army? Like you’ve been left with nothing to stand upon?

When God cuts down our armies, perhaps it’s because He desires that we trust Him alone. Maybe He wants us to go from trusting in what we can see, to trusting Who we can’t see.

We serve a powerful, all-mighty God. It doesn’t matter how many resources we have or how impossible our situation looks. God used a few pieces of bread and fish to feed a vast multitude, a small stone to bring down a giant, and 300 men to defeat an army of thousands upon thousands.

Lift your eyes from your depleted army to your Almighty God.

There’s nothing He can’t do.

For there is no restraint to the Lord to save by many or by few.” {I Samuel 14:6}

“Behold, I am the Lord, the God of all flesh: is there anything too hard for me?” {Jeremiah 32:27}

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